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Tag Archives: despair
“…Day Dreaming About “What If” With My Family…It’s So Tempting to Live in my Imagination”
1-17-2011 Journal Entry I was woken this morning due to a shakedown. As with the last two, Bob spent the rest of the morning bad mouthing the guards for taking what they took. I told him it is clear that … Continue reading
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Tagged "The Loosers", David Eddings, Daydreaming, despair, God, Loneliness, love, prayer, Purposeful Life, Satan, Shakedowns, truth, Vain Repetitions, Work
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Wrote About “My Fears on Finding Love and Returning to the Church”
11-26-2010 Journal Entry I finally finished my letter to Mom. I had planned on being vague about my fears on finding love and returning to the Church but found that the level of my despair has decreased and I was … Continue reading
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Tagged Aaronic Priesthood, Birthdays, Child-like Faith, despair, Ensign Magazine, God, Holy Spirit, love, Mormons, scriptures, Spiritual Responses
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“Ok, So I’m Panicking. Don’t Worry; I’ll Be Fine. I Really Need To Chill”
{Editors Note: This letter is a continuation of the letter previously posted dated 10-8-2010} 10-10-2010 Letter to Mom and Dad “It is Sunday. I stopped writing as my hand was cramping and that makes my already unreadable “fist” more unreadable. … Continue reading
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Tagged "A Christmas Story", Animals, Anxiety, back pain, Character, children, Dangerous, despair, GI Bill, Honesty, Intelligence, Letters, Manipulation, Money, Monkeys, Navy, Patriarchs, prison, Redheads, Zoo
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“My Time Is Done;…There Doesn’t Seem To Be Many Options Left.”
7-16-2010 Journal Entry “I met with my attorney. The D.A. still is not dealing. I am scared! It turns out that my pre-lim is on the __th—the girls have their plane tickets and I have only 11 days to give … Continue reading
“‘Old Voice’; ‘New Voice’; I Hope One Day There [Be] a ‘Future (Sane) Voice’, Which Is Not Yet”
6-6-2010 Letter To Mom and Dad “I have just come from our visitation—I feel less in despair now than I thought I would after our meeting. It is a relief to feel that you are hopeful for my minimum scenario. … Continue reading
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Tagged Abandonment, despair, family, forgiveness, Healing, hope, Paranoia, Rationalization, Utah
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Somewhere In Time
5-5-2010 Journal Entry “Suddenly, the theme of “Somewhere in Time” came to mind, filling my heart with sentimental love for the young Grace I married 19 years ago. That was the song playing at our wedding. Grace in her teal-blue … Continue reading
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Tagged "Somewhere In Time", despair, Emotion, family, Holidays, Prison time, Sentiment, sex offender, Stubbornness, Wedding
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“Oh God in Heaven” A Fervent Prayer From a Man in Despair
3-19-2010 Journal Entry “I am hurting, really bad. I didn’t pull myself out of bed until after 10pm this evening. I am not in physical pain; but a depression such that I have not felt—though I suppose that’s not true; … Continue reading
Posted in Uncategorized
Tagged Adversity, depression, despair, forgiveness, God the Father, Grace, Humility, pain
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“This Afternoon I Lost My Kids. I Am Completely Alone Now”
2-26-2010 Journal Entry “This afternoon I lost my kids. I knew it was going to happen but it is still hard to deal with. Grace is attempting to paint me as an unrepentant person to the court. She had a … Continue reading
“Perhaps I can share with you some hope” a letter from mom
1/3/10 Letter from Mom My Dear Son, Yes son, you are very dear to me and will be eternally because we are eternal; I your mother—you my son. I have great faith that this is true. I was hoping you … Continue reading
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Tagged despair, faith, forgiveness, Heavenly Father, hope, mother, Savior, struggle, truth
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